Testimony: “I Will Rejoice” by Deanna Wood
“This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.”
Psalm 118:24 (KJV)
My name is Deanna Wood. I am a follower of Jesus Christ and I am an anxiety survivor. I know what it is to be overwhelmed, nerves firing, heart full of fear, and to have no idea why. I understand panic attacks and succumbing to a feeling of utter lost-ness. I know what it is to feel you have no control over your body’s abnormal responses to normal stimuli. I’m betting that many of you know exactly what I’m talking about. Today, it seems that anxiety is an epidemic, reaching in and stealing the joy, peace and purpose of so many. If this is you, I want you to know you are not alone.
For me it started in 2006, with my first panic attack that simply didn’t end for months. As a believer, many days all I could do was cling to scripture – particularly the Psalms – and trust that God had a plan. Trust that ultimately He never wastes a hurt and he would use this somehow for my good. I had to trust that in this, in ways I couldn’t comprehend, Jesus was making me new.
One of the verses I stood upon during that time was Psalm 118:24: “This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.” This is a well-known verse, often quoted and even sung. I had never considered the meaning of it much beyond what seemed obvious: God made this day. We are going to rejoice and be glad about it. But during the most difficult periods of my anxiety, the verse became less of a happy lyric and more of a battle-cry:
This is the day the Lord has made. I WILL rejoice and be glad in it.
I will rejoice, emphasis on the “will.” As in a command. A marching-order. A directive to be followed without regard for how I might feel about it. That isn’t easy to do. But God knows better. He knows that those moments when we don’t feel like rejoicing are precisely the ones in which we most need to do just that. Rejoicing keeps us from falling deeper into the pit. It’s stepping up one more rung on the ladder out of the pit. It’s stretching an open hand towards the Father waiting to lift us out of the pit.
It wasn’t easy. Many days I had to ask God for enough strength just to get through the next hour. Minutes. Sixty seconds. But refusing to give in to the fear, the depression–choosing to praise Him even when it was hard–kept me from falling deeper into anxiety’s clutches. And as I walked through the slow process of healing, focusing on God and His bigger picture — especially the eternity he has so graciously given me through Jesus — I found that the rejoicing came more easily. And eventually, I found myself an anxiety survivor, not merely a sufferer.
Lately, though, it isn’t anxiety that’s been rocking my world. It’s, well…the world. Globally there is so much tragedy, violence and terror. In our own backyard, families are being torn apart. Family and friends are sick or struggling with their own issues. People we know and loved have died. The sheer sadness of it all can be overwhelming at times.
And this is when my God does what no one else can, reaching into my dark places and shining His light. Reminding me again that “this is the day He has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.” Because in sadness, as in anxiety, He has a bigger plan. He will not waste a hurt.
“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28 (KJV)
“For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory…” 2 Corinthians 4:17 (KJV)
And we rejoice, whether it be in anxiety, in sorrow, in loss, in sickness, in struggle or in pain, because this day moves us one day closer to the day when there will be no more sadness and no more tears.
“And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” Revelation 21:4 (KJV)
I rejoice because He has already won.
Author: Deanna Wood. Deanna Wood lives in Huntsville, Alabama, with her amazing husband, twin daughters, and two Westies, Frodo and Dobby. She is actively involved in ministry at Willowbrook Church and is the author of CleanCaptivatingFiction™, including the bestselling Christian suspense novel, UNINTENDED TARGET (www.dlwoodonline.com). If you would like more information about some of the things that helped Deanna push back against anxiety and reclaim her life, you can access her four-point guide at this link: – “Flipping Anxiety on Its Head”.
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