“What Are You Thinking About?” by Suzanne Matthews

I am sure you have had this happen to you – your brain won’t quit. Hundreds of things bombard your thoughts and it can be quite overwhelming. That’s where I am today. I am coming off a season of speaking to women’s groups, large and small, and as this month wraps up, my heart and brain are very full.

I’m thinking about…

Lent… the beautiful season when we have the privilege of repenting as we approach the cross. Yes, repenting; that very hard thing to do. Walking toward it I drag my feet; on the other side, I’m dancing.

My parenting… and how, even though my children are married and have children of their own, I still need to parent. I still need to pay attention. I need to tell them of my struggles at their ages and in their very circumstances. We still need to have heart to hearts. Someone asked me at a retreat who I would most like to go to dinner with if it could be anyone on the planet. I said my four children. I still to this day don’t get enough of them. They need to know that.

I want to know what you are thinking about.

I’m also thinking about…

Lauren Daigle… I went to her next-to-last concert in Nashville at the Ryman. It was a gift from my two daughters, and we all went together with Anna, my ten-year-old granddaughter. What caught me off guard was that the concert was worship. I’m thinking about how young Lauren Daigle is (27), and how she writes and sings words that God uses to pierce my heart, turn me around, bring me to forgiveness, and usher in joy.

Painting… I can’t decide what to paint. It’s the age-old problem that artists have when the creative juices quit flowing for a bit.

Most of all I’m thinking about Joshua. Joshua in the Bible. Moses’ aide who eventually led Israel into a new land.

I can’t quit thinking about Joshua as a young man in training under Moses and how Moses would meet with God at the Tent of Meeting. Then, Moses would go back to the camp to speak to the people, but Joshua would stay at the Tent. Partly to hold down the fort, but mostly because God was there.

I know there are quite a few of you out there holding down the fort: the home fort, prayer fort, work fort, financial fort. You may feel as if life is passing you by. But life is not passing you by. You have been selected for the best training camp in history, organized and adapted for you by God Himself. And He is with you there.

Although Joshua felt it was his job to stay at the Tent of Meeting after Moses departed, he lingered there because he learned as a youth that being near God was the only place worth being. It keeps cropping up over and over in his life, through all the battles fought and won, through all the land gained, Joshua keeps returning to Gilgal. The place where the Tent of Meeting and Ark of the Covenant resided. Returning over and again to the place where God was to get just a little more of God.  

I can’t quit thinking about Joshua after Moses died. Surely this had to be one of the lowest points in Joshua’s life. I wonder how many of you have been in a place like that. Not necessarily a Moses, but when someone moves out of the picture and it becomes your task to move in. You didn’t feel ready, your heart was failing in fear, you were still grieving, but God said so, so you did.

I don’t think Joshua thought he was ready for the task God set before him. Yet, when God handed over the reins, Joshua obediently took them. Terrified, discouraged, shaky, and with little strength, but we hear no complaint from Joshua. The only dialog is deep encouragement from God. There is no one else in this exchange – no friend, no family member, no officer or soldier. Just God and Joshua. It never fails to shake me a little bit, that there are times, crucial times, in our lives where there will be no one standing with us. Just God.  

I have had a Moses step into my life. I didn’t know it at first, then it became the clearest thing I’ve ever seen. She’s a few years ahead of me on the calendar, but light years ahead of me in wisdom. I am not saying she’s getting ready to die or turning over the reins; what I see is something else entirely. I am noticing that I linger where she has been. I watch her and listen. I take in what she relays to me. When she goes back to minister, I linger with God. For me, it is a time of soaking it all in. With anticipation that a new season is just ahead. 

I want to know what you are thinking about….

Written by Suzanne Matthews ~

Follow Suzanne at www.suzannewmatthews.com

Tags: Joshua, Lauren Daigle, Lent, Painting, parenting, Soul Food, Suzanne Matthews, Thoughts